Chatterbox teaching assistant

[con's fly is open]

I have a translator in my classes for younger kids. The idea is that she can translate in those moments when I have to give complex instructions, or they just can't understand me, no matter how I explain and pantomime. In other words, she is the last resort.

Supposed to be, anyway: she won't shut up! If the kids don't catch my meaning within 3 seconds (no exaggeration), she chimes in in Chinese. She waits all of 5 seconds to chirp in the answer if they're slow in figuring something out..

Now, instead of paying close attention or, god forbid, actually thinking to find an answer, they just turn to her. I talk to her about this before nearly every class, but she's getting worse. That leaves me with the following options:

1. Allow it to continue until I finally flip out.
2. Take her face in front of the parents.
3. Take her aside and scream at her- nothing civil has worked.
4. Complain to the principal and get her in trouble.
5. Arrange an accident.

I went with cowardly number 6: I explained my predicament to another Chinese teacher, who, the sweetheart, offered to have a word with her.

The quality of my teaching is suffering. If Eva's little chat doesn't work, I'll have to go to the first 5 options- I figure #3 would do her the least damage, so I'll start there.

[hankuh]

What does she look like? This could give you another option.

[Raoul Duke]

I hate this phenomenon. Perhaps a taste of the coal shovel will refresh her memory.

[Dr. Gonzo]

Teaching little kids................jeez!

[Raoul Duke]

Seriously, Con, this phenomenon is all too common and can, as you indicate, undermine the quality of your class. Don't let it happen.

If a friendly discussion with your colleague doesn't help, go to the manager. Tell them that it's eliminating your effectiveness. Your advice and opinions seem to be respected in your school, which to me indicates just how rural, clueless, and desperate this little school really must be. Chances are that, once informed, the school will either find you an another assistant that can find their own ass using both hands, or discipline the one you have, or at least buy you a coal shovel.

[acjade]

This seems to be the national standard of T.A's in the Middle Kingdom. They resemble Minnie Mouse on speed.

In the early days of my sojourn into the depths of the Education system the FT's were pimped out sent to a private school in the city on Saturday evenings.
It was such a frightening experience that most of the teachers went AWOL on Saturday mornings.

The most irritating thing about this experience was the proclivity of T.A's to wait quietly until you opened your mouth and then began translating faster than you could think.
ASk them however to do something useful like find the coloured pens or some teaching aids and they acted as if they were stone deaf and had not a single word of English stored in their brain.
The only thing I could make of this bizarre behaviour was some sort of nuturing rite... 'See children. I understand the lao wei. It's possible you will be able to learn english too. And please tell your parents what a good TA I am so the boss doesn't shout down my throat as soon as you have gone.'

[woza17]

I have seen this in Con's class and the little heads turn to the TA for understanding it's not necessary, she seems a good sort and I would just explain to her we have to wean them off Chinese in class. I have had some great TAs my favourite was the one that slept through class not a peep out of him but terrible role model.

[Nate M]

Maybe her motivation is more insidious. Allow me to connect the following dots:

1. TA helps to translate things kids can't understand.
2. TA is paid to do this job.
3. TA doing her job has hampered ability of almighty con to teach kids english.
4. Thus, kids aren't learning English as they should be, and are instead relying on TA as crutch.
5. Kids who aren't learning English cannot understand what con says.
6. Students still require a TA, because they cannot understand enough of Con's language to get by.
7. Thus, lack of student progress = job security for TA.
8. TA thus has a financial incentive to m'kay up con's classes.

Coincidence? I think not!

[con's fly is open]

Nate:

1. I LOVE the sound of "Almighty Con". Truth be told, I believe it.
2. Ellen is demonstrating how good a teacher SHE is. You nailed it.
3. She doesn't get the conept of children learning to actually THINK, rather than reguritate. Again, YNI.
4. there is an unspoken, semiconscious ego battle going on between her and me.

But no, she does NOT intend to undermine me. the thought hasn't even occurred to her- she's just covering my deficiencies as a teacher. She has one class of her own, and I can tell she's a good teacher.

But this is the thing: T.A.ing for an FT is THE worst job in the school. Given the choice between translating for a foreign teacher and cleaning the public bathroons with a handi-wipe, she would stand there, paralysed with indecision. Really, the job is menial: if you do it right, you open your mouth 4 times in an hour.

The best TA I ever had either read or played on his cell phone the entire time. I had to call his name twice in order to get his attention and translation. The students knew they had no choice but to try to figure out what the m'kay I was saying.

The paradox is that in order to be a good enough teacher to understand what your ideal role is, you need enough experience that you have classes of your own, and don't get stuck with this odious task in the first place.

The rub: I didn't teach very well this weekend. She's astute enough to have noticed this fact (saw it in her eyes). So I have to plan the greatest classes I have ever taught, then next week, demonstrate prefection on Saturday, then rule with an iron fist on Sunday.

Come on, in my classroom EVERYTHING is my fault.

Or my triumph. ai She'll see the light.

[OZgronk]

What about when they get so excited they even start answering your questions posed to the class!

[Ruth]

Has that really happened to you, Ozgronk? Seems unbelievable. Yet, this IS China, so I guess I should be open to accept anything as true.

If your statement was based on actual experience, what on earth did you do about it?

[OZgronk]

Ruth,

It was only a few weeks ago, the module was "Disabilities" (senior grade 2),

I had opened the lesson with the statement written up:

"I have a disability"....... I turn around to be greeted by some quizzical looks and a few murmurs.

I keep writing "but only in China"

Listen to hear them reading, as I continued writing:

"What is my disability?"

I read it all out again, waited the usual 3 minutes for the babelfish in their heads to do its work, and there was not much happening, apart from some flicking through their books trying to find the answer, until their Chinese English teacher who was sitting in the back row stood up and said excitedly "You can't speak Chinese"!

At first I thought it was a student as she is very young and blends right in, so I answered with my usual..."very good .... I can't speak English" wrote it on the board, turned back around and realised what had happened.

Well I just carried on as usual...what else could I do?

[George61]

In my early days here, I had translators that would provide the answers for the class. I told them to keep their mouths firmly shut til I gave them the nod. Most of them complied, but I had one I disliked intensely. She was a pure arse-licker, so I totally ignored her. She left the school after a few weeks.

[Ruth]

Hey Ozgronk - I know just the unit you are talking about since I teach senior 2 as well. Do you actually teach from the text book?

Here, the Chinese English teachers get to do all of that boring fun stuff. I can do what I want. I try to choose topics that will blend in with their texts. Sometimes the Chinese teachers will sit in on my lessons - to improve their English (or look at the flashy video lessons I do) - but most of the time I am on my own.

[OZgronk]

Normally Ruth, I keep the workbook where the light of day cannot get to it, and only use it as a concept guide.

In this particular case the unit's subject was an ideal launching pad for raising awareness on how difficult it is to communicate, hence my lead in.

[Decurso]

In my school all the TA's literally translate everything.It's maddening...I think I'm getting through to most of them on my own,but I have no way of knowing.I also fear I will become too reliant on the translations and when I find myself in a job without it...I'll be screwed.

It does no good to talk to the school,because this is their policy and they seem to think it is the only way to learn.I'm not about to openly criticize my schools methods...but privately I think that this is why everyone in this town studies English from primary school upwards and still can't hold the simplest of conversations to save their lives.

[con's fly is open]

I hear you, Decurso, and agree completely. If only my TA had a Pause button. My advice to everybody, if you get to choose a TA, pick the laziest one possible, particularly one who will read or play the games on his fancy phone, and not even pay attention. Then the students are screwed, and have to actually follow you.

[Ruth]

ozgronk said:

Normally Ruth, I keep the workbook where the light of day cannot get to it, and only use it as a concept guide.

In this particular case the unit's subject was an ideal launching pad for raising awareness on how difficult it is to communicate, hence my lead in.

I used the 'I'm handicapped and so are many of you in this class' for a lead-in. What a bunch of shocked looks I got. I wear glasses. One kid figured it out.

Con, I'm so glad I don't have 'help' in my classes. What a pain in the tush TAs seem to be. I rely on drawing pictures (which I suck at) or using words they already know to explain the new word or dramatic enactments of the concept (which I'm getting better at). Enough students have the electronic translators or dictionaries that we manage.

With my private kids at home, who are mostly primary, I have lots of pictures for teaching aids. They learn - somehow. From the little I've studied about learning a foreign language, the direct translation method isn't the best. Yet all of China seems to rely on it. We can only do what we can do in our small realm of influence. Hang in there.

[con's fly is open]

Ruth, I do precisely the same thing: the frenetic pantomime, impromptu drawings on the board, and everything I can muster to get the message across. This is one of the best moments in my classes: the little buggers straining to figure out what the hell I mean.

I make their brains grow.

At least, until God's gift to education opens her big bazoo.

[Mr Nobody]

Are sidearms an option? It could be considered a mercy killing if you get the right lawyer.

[George61]

Con and Ruth, you are not making them think, are you? poo, that's a big no-no. All their school lives have been spent LISTENING..to the questions, and then to the answers...This thinking stuff is too hard.

[Mr Nobody]

Yeah, I noticed that from 1999 my first visit. My martial art REQUIRES that people think. Long story, but it is true. Here on the mainland, they train so hard at it, but have limited understanding. Then, i realized recently that in fact compared to their counterparts in China learning other things these guys are in fact really insightful.


Over the last two days I have been exposed to some of the worst planning disasters since the Big Guy put a tree in Eden and said, don't eat that red and green thing.

My earlier joke about learning things from sisters uncles brothers etc turns out to be all too true.

Sheesh. Having the second of two bad consecutive days, but things are looking brighter.

[con's fly is open]

george61 said:

Con and Ruth, you are not making them think, are you? poo, that's a big no-no. All their school lives have been spent LISTENING..to the questions, and then to the answers...This thinking stuff is too hard.

George, we're foreigners. LAOWAI, remember? We have been sent by our imperial countries' spy agencies to sow dissidence, decadence and social upheaval in the only true People's Republic in the world. Since I don't have a girlfriend, I can't spread AIDS, so perverting the right thinking of my students is my only opening.

How the hell am I supposed to assert Western hegemony if the parents monitor me, and this infernal Chonguaren laoshi thwarts my every attempt to plant the seeds of counterrevolution?

Next you'll tell me to abandon our plans to arm Taiwan to attack the mainland, rape their women and move the 2008 Olympics to Japan.

[Mr Nobody]

We're moving it to JAPAN? I thought we were moving it to South Korea.

[Ruth]

This thinking stuff is too hard.

I've noticed that when they actually have to think to get a word, it sticks in their minds better. What a concept. Maybe along the lines of 'teach a man to fish' rather than giving him the fish.

Any way you can convince the school leaders that you don't need a TA?