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Post by Raoul Duke on Nov 1, 2006 0:44:14 GMT 7
Hey! Today is November 1st. That means that May 1st is exactly 6 months (or, in the Metric system, 3.14159 millifurlongs short of a hectare) from today. There will be a party in Suzhou for that May holiday break. It will set new records. It will leave a smoking crater. Members, I really want you all to come to this one. Why this one in particular? Well, there's been ugly talk of my going back to the States a year or so from now. I need to see if I can somehow reattach myself to my family there...I haven't been home in over 5 years. If I do go back, it will likely be for quite a long time. Years. I hope it's not true, in a way. I love living here and I don't want to go back. Much of me hopes I'm back here next year, bleating lame excuses at you about coming to the 4th Party. But there's a pretty good chance I'll be heading back. I love my family, too. So, please come. This may well be our last chance, for a very long time, at a Group Hug. It's way too early to start signup lists and announce activities and so on. But I'm calling dibs now; please start clearing your calendars. Please don't tell me you're going to North Korea to help produce ball bearings. Please don't tell me that vague groups of friends and relatives may or may not be drifting in over the holiday. Please don't tell me you're going to a Bar Mitzvah in Sichuan Province. Just come, dammit. Come shake all our hands. Come put faces and true personalities (Yeek!  ) on all your friends here. Come and have a pooload of fun! Be advised that there won't be free bedrooms this year unless we've known you, preferably Biblically, for a very long time. Why not? Please see the "Announcement- We Got Gonged!" thread near the top of this board. However, I've found a galaxy of small cheap hotels around central Suzhou...and there's always the DongWu. We should be able to put you up for 100-200 RMB per night; less if you share a room. ALL current members in good standing are invited to come, even if you're new with us. However, we have at least learned a few lessons from the last 2 Parties, especially last year's: - If you are a member of an organization that's illegal in China and you're using us to come here and spread the word about your idiot cult, you are not welcome here and we will kick your ass if we find out. Please don't come. We had one of these last year. - If you often tend to get staggering drunk and cry about various injustices for hours in the middle of a dinner party, please don't come. We had one of these last year, too. - If you often tend to get staggering drunk and pick fights with other people at the Party, please don't come. Same as the above. - If you often tend to get staggering drunk, black out, and wake up months later naked and alone in a Mexican border town and you're not even from North America in the first place...well, this one is a tough call.  - ADDENDUM: Yodeling anywhere within 200 km of Raoul or El Rancho Raoul is a hangin' offense. Don't do it.  The good news is that so far this doesn't leave out more than about 2 people. So come on down! The other good news is that The Dong Gang (the motley crew that already lives here in Suzhou) is already getting on their thinking caps to come up with even cooler activities than last year's Party! So come on down, all y'all!  |
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Post by Raoul Duke on Nov 1, 2006 0:50:45 GMT 7
Oh, just for the record:
This event is in Suzhou (near Shanghai), Jiangsu Province (near the east end of the Yangzi River), China (near Laos).
More details to come.
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Escaped Lunatic
Barfly
Civet Burger? Sounds tempting. Can I get fries with that?
Posts: 567
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Post by Escaped Lunatic on Nov 1, 2006 1:19:09 GMT 7
> If you often tend to get staggering drunk, black out, and wake up months later naked and alone in a Mexican border town and you're not even from North America in the first place...well, this one is a tough call. Dammit Raoul! I thought we agreed NEVER to speak of that again.  |
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Post by Becster79 on Nov 1, 2006 17:28:38 GMT 7
Would love to come Raoul, but being sorta kinda out the boonie way I have no freakin' idea how I would get my hot little hands on a train ticket AND back again for just that week! The students are always whingeing and whining about tickets during this time of year as it is.... ....and in the OFF chance I do happen to make it, you'd better not expect any 'special' dances of me   !! |
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Post by Raoul Duke on Nov 1, 2006 18:37:49 GMT 7
Bec, we got six months to work it out. We'll get ya here and back. You just get those dates free. And, of course, rehearse that dance.  |
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Post by Dragonsaver on Nov 1, 2006 20:23:15 GMT 7
I have a DVD of me onstage yodeling.  I can bring that and entertain the gang!! You Raoul especially!! |
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Post by hankuh on Nov 1, 2006 20:36:34 GMT 7
If, however, you get drunk, lap whiskey off the floor, participate in deviant exhibitionism, and frolic with Aussie females, then this could be the very party for you.
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Post by Raoul Duke on Nov 1, 2006 22:09:51 GMT 7
Right On, Br'er Bubba! Meanwhile: DS, I love ya. Don't make me hurt ya or nothin'.  Please note the modification to the original post in this thread! |
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Post by solongtinik on Nov 2, 2006 15:32:29 GMT 7
that would make me come back in china for sure!
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Post by Hamish on Nov 3, 2006 2:23:58 GMT 7
I hate it when RD lays out rules aimed directly at me.
Ain't fittin'
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Post by Jollyjunklass on Nov 9, 2006 13:25:54 GMT 7
I'm glad those rules were for you Hamish, for a while there I was getting a little paranoid. I seem to recall being in Suzhou and.....................well, hmmm  Can you tell us why you have to go home Raoul, or is it personal? What will happen to the Saloon, will you still work with it? |
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Post by Raoul Duke on Nov 9, 2006 17:28:58 GMT 7
No need for paranoia, JJL. Please come. Bring Li with you. Those rules really were meant for Hamish; he HAS to travel abroad extensively because he seems to have worn out his welcome in all the decent cities of China. My reasons for considering returning are really as stated: I haven't seen my family in 5 years plus and I want to try to reconnect with them. If I'm able to get my little girl out with me, I'll probably be stuck Stateside for a long time. I'd kinda like her to grow up there instead of here. If I am part of her life, then I figure the day she comes home wearing one of those wretched little red neckerchiefs will be the day I go postal and start shooting randomly into crowds. If I do go back, then of course I'll continue to work with the Saloon. I'll probably need it even more than ever. I'm a bit like a bad case of the crabs: once I get into a pair of drawers I'm almost impossible to get rid of. I also have a succession plan in mind; a matter for Behind The Curtain. Whatever happens, I think it's important to have a go-to person in place ready to step in should something happen to me. You never can tell when I might go postal and start shooting randomly into crowds. I hope the Saloon outlives all of us. Especially....well, no, never mind. |
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Newbs
SuperDuperBarfly! 
If you don't have your parents permission to be on this site, naughty, naughty. But Krusty forgives
Posts: 2,085
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Post by Newbs on Nov 10, 2006 14:56:11 GMT 7
Mate, wicked post and thanks for sharing. Trust all works out well for you and the little chickie in the long term, and that she grows up with a foot in each culture (take your point about the red scarf, but), rooting for the (insert preferred sport and team here), feeling like a part of two great countries, and showing a real preference for Vegemite sandwiches. |
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Loops
Barfly
Raoul, after a day reading the garbage we dump on his forum...
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Post by Loops on Nov 18, 2006 4:05:04 GMT 7
Heya Boss!  Hello all! I am back after a long hiatus...I trust nobody missed me? I hope to be able to attend the May Day Celebrations, but I plan to go to the Philippines in March...Maybe I can get that week off and get drunk with all a youze once again...'ceptin this time if we go on a cruise, I wanna be pissed drunk/right twisted on the boat cruise...technicolour yodel off the port bow... I will try to get back here more often...I also wonder if I can still rightly post on here when I'm in Manila... I like to keep my fans wanting more, so I'll leave it at that and post again another day! Luv y'all, specially The Big Taco(with alotta lube, of course). |
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Post by gretch on Nov 18, 2006 11:44:40 GMT 7
Of course I'll be there, head cheeze! After all, it was that little shindig that, in a round about way, is the reason I am still in China and relocated to Suzhou. I'll do my part to make this party as memorable as possibe for ya, Boss!!! Now, whether or not that memory will bring smiles to your face or chills down your spine is a different story...      DS: I have to agree everyone here re: the yodeling, let's just put it this way, it's your life, how much do you cherish it?  Bec: I was in Xianyang, Shaanxi last May holiday and I made it, no problem. I rearranged my classes and left a couple days b/f the holiday. The school helped me get train tickets. |
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Post by con's fly is open on Nov 19, 2006 16:36:53 GMT 7
Becster: What Gretch said: book WELL in advance, and you'll be fine.
You know, I never realized how terrifying yodelling is until last Mayday gatherin'. I already knew about baijiu...
Loops: When you end up over there you can send us field reports. I know squat about the Phillipines.
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Post by Lotus Eater on Nov 19, 2006 20:18:51 GMT 7
I really think this should be teh required uniform of the next Suzhou meet. Scientists create muscial T-shirt Reuters 14nov06 AUSTRALIA scientists have invented a T-shirt that allows air guitarists to play actual music as they strum the air. The T-shirt, created by scientists from the Commonwealth Scientific and Industrial Research Organisation (CSIRO), is called a "wearable instrument shirt." The shirt has sensors in each elbow and sleeves to detect and interpret the air guitarist's arm movements - one arm chooses chords and the other strums imaginary strings. The gestures are then connected wirelessly to guitar audio samples to generate the music. "It's an easy to use, virtual instrument that allows real time music making, even by players without significant musical or computing skills," said CSIRO engineer Richard Helmer. "It allows you to jump around and the sound generated is just like an original mp3," Helmer said. Researchers specialising in computing, musical composition and textile manufacture combined their skills to create the musical T-shirt. "The technology, which is adaptable to almost any kind of apparel, takes clothing beyond its traditional role of protection and fashion into the realms of entertainment," said Helmer. A video of Helmer demonstrating the air-guitar t-shirt is available on the CSIRO's website, www.scienceimage.csiro.au/mediarelease/air-guitar.html. |
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Post by MyTurnNow on Nov 19, 2006 21:48:33 GMT 7
I fear that the venue for this event, or even the event itself, is currently under some doubt. Please stay tuned.
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Post by Jollyjunklass on Nov 20, 2006 10:49:32 GMT 7
It seems somethings have happened in the last few days. Why have the brains changed their names and avatars and what happened to bubba and AJ?
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Escaped Lunatic
Barfly
Civet Burger? Sounds tempting. Can I get fries with that?
Posts: 567
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Post by Escaped Lunatic on Nov 21, 2006 4:14:33 GMT 7
>I fear that the venue for this event, or even the event itself, is currently under some doubt. NOOOO!!!!!  I already booked my non-refundable yak-drawn carriage tickets.  My experience in China won't be complete if I don't get a chance to puke my guts out all over Raoul's apartment. |
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Post by Raoul Duke on Dec 1, 2006 17:55:26 GMT 7
This party is, by the grace of God, definitely and pretty much irrevocably back on! Loony, my furniture awaits your vomiting pleasure!
5 months and counting. Start kicking your travel agent now!
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Post by Mr Nobody on Dec 2, 2006 13:36:56 GMT 7
I am back after a long hiatus...I trust nobody missed me? I will try to get back here more often...I also wonder if I can still rightly post on here when I'm in Manila... (with alotta lube, of course). Of course I missed you, ya big lug. and of course you can post from manilla, the butch bars all have internet. I will do my damndest to get there and join in the throwing up over Raoul's sacred furniture. Sorry about being away, I have had "issues" of a time consuming sort. Busier than a one armed juggler with crabs. Nothing to worry about. Cheers. |
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Post by Stil on Dec 3, 2006 10:13:31 GMT 7
Sorry to hear you have crabs.
best wishes
stil
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Post by solongtinik on Dec 3, 2006 10:20:10 GMT 7
loops, u're going to manila in march? whew! u chose the HOTTEST but the BEST month to party in my country's capital! try LIBIS and ROCKWELL! man, they rock!!!!!!!!!
hot party animals are all around manila!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
no prob with netbars in my lovely country!
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Post by Raoul Duke on Dec 9, 2006 23:58:29 GMT 7
Good News! A big worry people have in coming here for the Party is arranging travel around the May Holiday...and it's a very understandabl worry. So, I am delighted to offer a solution to the problem! Peter Gu is the travel agent at the Sheraton Hotel in Suzhou. He's always taken great care of me and my friends when we've had travel needs. I sat down today and told him about the Party and the problems people have. He said that [glow=red,2,300] if you will give him enough notice[/glow] he will book the entire trip for you...he will provide full doorstep-to-doorstep service for all of you, both directions, no matter where you are, air train or bus, with a single phone call or e-mail. He can even book you into a cheap hotel if you want, but we'll probably try to set up another Animal House where everyone can stay together. He can get tickets 2 weeks in advance, and will have to have the tickets sent to you, so you should be in touch with him by very early April. He does assess a very small service charge for booking these tickets, but please emphasize the words very small. I think the service charge for train tickets is 20 RMB; a small price to pay for a chance to trade brain damage, liver failure, and venereal diseases with your friends, right here in The Nicest City In China TM. You can reach Peter at 0512-6510-6361 or guchunxiang@yahoo.com Ask for Peter Gu and tell him you're a friend of Raoul's. He can take all major credit cards, bank transfers, or postal money orders. [glow=red,2,300] The secret is in planning early.[/glow] So, let's see less bleating and puling, and more packing, please. |
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