Nolefan et Cie.

[Raoul Duke]

Here is a photo of Nolefan (right) that lets you actually see him in all his glory. He's seated here with his delightful and deservedly much-celebrated better half (left) and an anonymous hoser (center).

We're all at Mario's Pizza, a newly arrived Italian restaurant that adds to the ever-growing list of good reasons to live in Suzhou.

[Mr Nobody]

What's a hoser? And what has that disgusting caterpillar done on Nolefan's chin? Or is it some weird kind of local beer effect? The girl seems nice, except for her taste in friends.

I gotta get me to Suzhou.

[Newbs]

What the hell is Nolefan and his better half doing, having pizza with Salman Rushdie?

[Dr. Gonzo]

I do believe "hoser" is an even more derogatory term for a Canuck. God bless them all, especially Neil Young.

[Mr Nobody]

Where does "hoser" come from?

I didn't know Neil Young was Canadian.

These are mysteries of the Universe that I have not yet come to terms with.

[Ruth]

From Cynthia Lockley (whoever she is, I found it on Google)

For all those who have asked me what "hoser" means, here is a good definition from Canadian Words; a comic browse through words and folk sayings invented by Canadians by Bill Casselman, Copp Clark Ltd., 1995, ISBN 0-7730-5515-0

"A hoser is the all-Canadian, beer-swilling, tuque-headed yokel, as popularized by Bob & Doug McKenzie, TV characters created by SCTV stars Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas.

A hoser is one who hoses. As a colloquial verb, for some thirty years, to hose has meant to clobber the opposing team in a hockey game, also to screw someone up, to mess up another's plans."

slang. 1. noun: (deragatory) an oaf, or simpleton. 2. noun: (friendly) a friend, brother or faithful companion. 3. verb: hose-off; a put-off; go away, leave me; I doubt what you are saying. History: The term originates from a syndicated television comedy about a fictional television station: 'Second City Television Station' or 'SCTV.' Comedy skits on the show were presented as actual programs. One such skit was a program entitled "the Great White North" - the hosts, comedians Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas (portraying Bob and Doug MacKenzie), embellished and exaggerated the stereotypical American image of how Canadians talk and act. The characters (Bob and Doug) drank beer, while bantering back and forth, inflecting their speech heavily with 'eh?' and the occasional 'hoser.'

Back off you hoser!

Come here hoser, I was just kidding.

From the American Heritage Dictionary (online)

NOUN: Canadian Slang A clumsy, boorish person, especially an uncouth, beer-drinking man.

Hope this helps to further your education, Mr. N.

[Lotus Eater]

Sounds like an 'ocker'. Oxford Dictionary - a boorish or uncultivated Australian.

Clearly unlike the Hogan members of this forum.

[con's fly is open]

We look like we got a three-for-one deal at the local eyewear kiosk.

[Mr Nobody]

Now I am educated. I obviously have much to learn.

So, now we say to Canadians: "Back off, you Hoser!"?

Especially if they go near the beer?

[Ruth]

daoding said:

So, now we say to Canadians: "Back off, you Hoser!"?

You can only say it if you mean it in a friendly way to a brother or close companion. Otherwise - them's fighting words. Don't EVER say it to me. I don't fit the description. Maybe it's kinda like how Aussies call each other bastard. You guys use that word unlike any way I've heard it used before. Kind of endearing, but you only say it to people you like, right?

Con - good call on the eyewear special.

[Lotus Eater]

Yes - and the same way as Chinese say 'baichi'

[Mr Nobody]

Yeah. And besides, all the Canadians bastards here are welcome to the beer. ( I don't think Con fits that description of Hoser, either. But then, I wonder what it says under 'bastard'?)

[Raoul Duke]

Actually, I think it should technically be "Take off, ya hoser!" alt. "Take off, ya knob!"

To learn to sound Canadian, just master the Magic Phrase: "I ain't gonna pay no dollar for a corn muffin that's mostly dough." The secret is in getting the Os right.

[con's fly is open]

And the short A's known phonetically as /ae/. For instance, I come from cAAAlgree, AAAAlbrrduh cAAAnuhduh. The ungodly noise distinctive vowel sound is best compared to Daffy Duck screaming "AAAAAAAA!!!!" as someone shouts "HASSAN CHOP!"

[Mr Nobody]

Note to self: Sometimes it is better to remain ignorant.

[cheekygal]

25 Signs Showing You Might Be Canadian


1. You're not offended by the term "HOMO MILK".

2. You understand the phrase "Could you pass me a serviette, I just dropped my poutine, on the chesterfield."

3. You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.

4. You drink Pop, not Soda.

5. You know that a Mickey and 24's mean, "party at the camp, eh!!!"

6. You don't care about the fuss with Cuba. It's a cheap place to go for your holidays, with good cigars and no Americans.

7. You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway.

8. You drive on a highway, not a freeway.

9. You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.

10. You know that Casey and Finnegan were not part of a Celtic musical group.

11. You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.

12. You brag to Americans that; Shania Twain, Jim Carrey, Celine Dion & Mike Myers are Canadians.

13. You know that the C.E.O. of American Airlines is a Canadian!

14. You know what a touque is.

15. You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

16. You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced "Zed".

17. Your local newspaper covers the national news on 2 pages, but requires 6 pages for hockey.

18. You know that the four seasons mean: almost winter, winter, still winter and road work.

19. You know that when it's 25 degrees outside, it's a warm day.

20. You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.

21. You know how to pronounce and spell "Saskatchewan".

22. You perk up when you hear the theme song from 'Hockey Night in Canada'.

23. You are in grade 12, not the 12th grade.

24. "Eh?" is a very important part of your vocabulary, and is more polite than,"Huh?"

25. You actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all of your Canadian friends! Then you send them to your American friends just to confuse them!

[Stil]

Cheekygal, no Canadians brag about Celine Dion and if her name comes up we will all quickly let you know that she is from Quebec and so she doesn't really count.

Went to high school with Jim Carrey, complete a-hole that was given the boots several times. Dropped out after grade 10.

Mike Myers was a really nice guy though.

You realise that all Canadians know each other dontcha? After all our population is about 100. Are we gonna have a May 2-4 bash this year? Wasaga anyone?

Oh, and the proper pronunciation of Toronto is Tronna

[cheekygal]

Hey, they are CANADIANS who sent me that! From TRONNA by the way

[Newbs]

Hey Stil, are you a Canuckistan? Somehow I had the feeling that you were a Pom. My most abject and sincere apologies.

I'm a Hoganlander in case that fact has escaped you.

[Raoul Duke]

Canadians, like Hogans, really basically ARE Poms.
Check out yer money and/or your flags sometime.

Yes, there definitely is a May bash coming!

[George61]

Canadians, like Hogans, really basically ARE Poms

And where did you lot come from??
One reason Australia was filled with English scum is because you lot were so revolting, the English scum couldn't be sent there anymore!!
There were just as many convicts sent to USAnia as there were sent to Hoganland.

[gengrant]

And where did you lot come from??

uh, George, I must have come from America, cause I'm American...at least the Chinese tell me I am...I try to say I'm from USAnia and they get all confused.

[George61]

and they get all confused.

It's prolly the kilt!

[Stil]

A Pom! no, no, no. Like our USAnian and Hoganlander brothers, we were able to escape that retched little island (or were forced out - semantics)

[Ruth]

Cheeky - Thanks for the good read.

Stil - I'd join you at Wasaga, but I have other plans for the May holiday. Sorry. Step-daughters and grandkids live really close to Wasaga, so it would've been a good party.