|
Post by Lotus Eater on Jun 18, 2005 4:34:54 GMT 7
Yessterday I got an SMS from a guy. In it - and here you guys on the board have to be NICE!!! OK!!!! In it he talked about how there is no mountain without valleys, no rice without boiling water, no etc, and no colour in his life without me, and he wanted to be my brother for life. Nice romantic stuff yes??? I should have swooned - yes? I tutored this guy for a few weeks for his Cambridge Business English exam - we got together at least twice a week. He paid me in pool games. We talked, I knew a fair bit about his personal life. But he is also a student of in one of my classes - and the SMS arrived the day before the exam! What exactly do we call corruption these days?
|
|
|
Post by George61 on Jun 18, 2005 5:18:58 GMT 7
Lotus, you know that sms is the root of all evil and you should nener ever date your students or the sky will fall down, etc etc I was going to make evil jokes, but I thought better. So, a simple SMS gets you all in a tizzy?? I blame Woza! Her wedding thread has got you all in a lather!
|
|
woza17
SuperDuperBarfly!
Posts: 2,203
|
Post by woza17 on Jun 18, 2005 7:14:08 GMT 7
Brother or lover they sound similar.
Everything is my fault George
|
|
|
Post by George61 on Jun 18, 2005 7:19:14 GMT 7
|
|
|
Post by acjade on Jun 18, 2005 7:21:35 GMT 7
No mountain without valleys? No rice without boiling water? LE. I don't think this guy was thinking of exams when he sent this to you. The new hairstyle is obviously a big success. Can I meet your hairdresser?
|
|
|
Post by Dr. Gonzo on Jun 18, 2005 7:54:44 GMT 7
Let's see if he's so eloquent AFTER he fails the exam. Though if he passes, looks like you'll get laid. Keep us up to date.
|
|
|
Post by hankuh on Jun 18, 2005 10:42:39 GMT 7
Maybe I should have put this upstairs, but lately my attitude tends to approach the WTF pointer of my attitude range:
Some of you may remember the Madame X episode of my wretched, soiled life from many months back.
Well, boy howdy, yesterday during my informal essay exam, Madame X made her one and only semester appearance. I confronted her. She stated:
"Mister So and So and Dean So and So said I could take your exam, and I could pass it."
My response:
"I don't give a crap if Jiang Zemin, Hu Jin Tao, and George Bush and the Four Horsemen from the Apocalypse said you would pass my exam! I ain't playing this BULLpoo game!"
Her response: "But I'm with the police!"
My response: (apologies to Lotus eater for phrase)
"Point of information: You haven't been in my class all semester long. You don't even have the friggin' textbook. You don't even have a friggin' clue what I am saying right now, and you SURE don't have a clue about writing the essay!"
Her response: "But can I take your exam?"
My response:
"Certainly! Of course! By all means, take my exam! I welcome you with open foreign arms. In fact, I demand you take my exam! Please pay homage to guanxi and houmen! Please sit in this desk."
Her response:
"I don't have any paper. I don't have a pen. I don't have a textbook!"
My response:
"Oh forgive me for my rude welcome. Here's a pen. Here's some paper."
Her response:
"Thank you!" (pause) "Oh could I have a textbook?"
My response: "Yes, here you are. This is my textbook! It's chock full with four years of notes, and various marginal comments. Please feel free to use them!"
Her response: "Thank you. You are very kind!"
My response: "Is there anything else you will need to take my exam?"
Her response:
"No. That's all."
My response:
"You need knowledge. You need thinking skills. You need the ability to comprehend the question. You need the ability frankly to know what the hell is going on!"
Her response:
"Ok."
My response:
"One more thing?"
Her response:
"Yes?"
"I'm failing your ass. If you pass, it wasn't because of me! Ming bai ma?"
Then, I walked away.
Of course, if she had looked attractive, and if she would have been willing to use her manacles on me after the exam while wearing her tight blue police uniform, which exudes total dominance and rigid authority, I would probably have passed her. It would have been the right thing to do--hormonally speaking of course!
|
|
|
Post by con's fly is open on Jun 18, 2005 11:31:21 GMT 7
Lotus, the second after you register everybody's marks, you're ethically just fine. Is he a good guy? They don't grow on trees- don't invent TOO many criteria for passing on them.
|
|
|
Post by Raoul Duke on Jun 18, 2005 11:39:47 GMT 7
Keep us posted, THA. I wouldn't have given her the exam...I don't think, anyway.
|
|
woza17
SuperDuperBarfly!
Posts: 2,203
|
Post by woza17 on Jun 18, 2005 12:30:25 GMT 7
Good on you tank. It really pisses me off when students come to class without a pen or paper, much less the textbook. What are they thinking, they're going to see a movie or a play or something. I say, send her to the countryside for 5 years and plant rice or something.
|
|
|
Post by Lotus Eater on Jun 18, 2005 13:22:48 GMT 7
Hey - we aren't dating!! He is a STUDENT - I have rock solid rules and ethics about this. NO STUDENT from my own university - ever!!! He wanted to pay me money for the tutoring. I know he can't afford it - the pool games were a way of letting him give me something back, that we could both enjoy.
But I did think it was really funny that he sent the SMS the day before the exam. I will bet a round of Raoul's finest alcohol another one does not arrive after the results are out. Open the betting book please barkeep.
I haven't looked at his paper yet, so have no idea if he passed or not - and my method of marking is to not bother looking at their names until I have completed all of the papers, then I record the scores into the computer - only time I actually match marks to names.
Hairy - you were patient, but at least she can't claim you discriminated against her. And it won't be hard to fail her - the evidence will be in black and white (was it a black pen?).
|
|
woza17
SuperDuperBarfly!
Posts: 2,203
|
Post by woza17 on Jun 18, 2005 13:29:49 GMT 7
Lotus why do you think he was flattering you so he could get better marks I don't think so. He really enjoyed your company and you made his life more exciting that's all, I think if he thought that you thought that, he would be really sad
|
|
|
Post by George61 on Jun 18, 2005 14:25:40 GMT 7
|
|
woza17
SuperDuperBarfly!
Posts: 2,203
|
Post by woza17 on Jun 18, 2005 14:42:30 GMT 7
Hey, George don't call me old
|
|
|
Post by George61 on Jun 18, 2005 14:51:31 GMT 7
|
|
|
Post by Lotus Eater on Jun 18, 2005 14:59:19 GMT 7
hey it wasn't old he called you - it was Spanish - Ole!! He may actually have been trying to be charming!
|
|
|
Post by Mr Nobody on Jun 18, 2005 15:01:58 GMT 7
|
|
|
Post by con's fly is open on Jun 18, 2005 17:27:58 GMT 7
I stand by my statement, Lotus. Once he's out of your class, there is no conflict of interest. Love is the higher law. Of course, ethics can sometimes be a safe excuse...
|
|
|
Post by Lotus Eater on Jun 18, 2005 18:01:00 GMT 7
Con - he is going to have to be a little older than he is - both mentally and chronologically - for me to fall in love! I find a lot of the guy students here to be 'younger' than the equivalent guys back home. Not certain why - too restricted an upbringing maybe? Too much concentration on books in middle school and not evough chance to get into mischief? There have only been a few students that I see as having that sort of 'edge' where you know they could be dangerous.
|
|
|
Post by con's fly is open on Jun 18, 2005 18:32:32 GMT 7
Oh. fair enough. Carry on.
|
|
|
Post by acjade on Jun 18, 2005 22:00:40 GMT 7
My student came to my hole in the rock after his CET 4 this morning. Just in time to read Teacher Hairy Arse's post. Well I was lying on the floor laughing and he wanted to know why considering the past week had been sent to me by the gods to test my will to sign another 12 month contract. He said: you know ming bai ma? I said: it means ' understand?' he said: how you know that? I said: context. GIST. he said: I very proud of you. I said: But what did you think of the annecdote? he said: sounds like you yesterday when STUDENT X come to you to apologise for not attending your class. But STUDENT X not policeman. Not child of policeman. No one in class like STUDENT X. But he come from poor family. They to pay more money for him to pass your class. What you gonna do? I said: McKay! Got me over a barrel there, kiddo.
|
|
|
Post by George61 on Jun 19, 2005 3:31:59 GMT 7
Who said anything about "LOVE"?? LUST is ok!
|
|
|
Post by acjade on Jun 19, 2005 7:18:01 GMT 7
George, George, George. You dear deluded man. I say this with respect and affection my dear guru of bubblewrap but... has no one ever told you that women only lust as long as they are in love? We no longer lie back and think of England. I think George perhaps you oughtta fly to Singapore and enrol in Dr Cheezylove's semen-ah post haste.
|
|
|
Post by Mr Nobody on Jun 19, 2005 7:30:25 GMT 7
So, let me see if I have this straight, you are saying that no woman ever just sacked with some guy due to lust, but each one was in fact love? Is this what you are saying? So one night stands are actually a serious emotional involvement?
Boy, I have really been misunderstanding women all these years.
|
|
|
Post by George61 on Jun 19, 2005 7:36:50 GMT 7
AJ, I am too busy to go to Singapore. I have to deal with lust everyday......or is it love??...maybe it's LOVES to LUST! Men are more direct than women. We know lust when we see it. Women are basically blind. That's why they wear rose-coloured specs.
|
|