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Post by acjade on Nov 16, 2006 15:29:10 GMT 7
Like PMing stuff isn't helpful Why can't it be out in the open.
You say we're a family. So what happened to round family discussions.
I don't trust the we're Mum and Dad discussions. My problem. When I was a kid my father always asked our views and then he and ma got together for a private discussion.
Healthy families openly discuss issues.
Why not have a family meeting upstairs?
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Post by Raoul Duke on Nov 16, 2006 17:09:22 GMT 7
I think there are times when both can be appropriate.
Personally, I think settling personal disputes quietly and privately can be a lot better than airing all the dirty laundry and ending up with people getting even angrier and trading abuse and the whole thing snowballing and turning this place into another Dave's or some other similar Thunderdome.
But that's only my opinion. I don't want to publicly ram it down anyone's throat- a tendency to which, in some quarters, I feel is behind a lot of our troubles in the first place.
Anyway, I was simply offering to help if I could. If you want to open a closed thread to tell me that my offer isn't helpful, then jump in and do things the way you feel is better, that's your karma.
'Cause frankly, I'm pretty sick to my stomach about now. I'm tired of being the hamburger in The Meat Grinder Of My Friends.
So, knock yerself out.
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Post by con's fly is open on Nov 16, 2006 19:27:22 GMT 7
Healthy families know when to keep silent and let things simmer down. Things is pretty raw right now, and a little chillin' is called for, IMHO.
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Ruth
SuperDuperMegaBarfly 
God's provisions are strategically placed along the path of your obedience.
Posts: 3,915
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Post by Ruth on Nov 17, 2006 6:06:47 GMT 7
If an issue is with just a couple of people, there is no reason for the entire family to be involved. Sorting it out behind closed doors seems like the wisest route to take.
Acjade, why do you think PMing the Brains isn't helpful?
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Crippler
Barfly
Beware the conspiracy!
Posts: 345
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Post by Crippler on Nov 17, 2006 9:32:03 GMT 7
Man I must have thick skin! I didn't realize we were getting so dysfunctional. I will bake a cake!  Now everyone take a deep breath, grab a spoon and dig in! |
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Post by Dajiang on Nov 17, 2006 11:08:50 GMT 7
why thank you.
and indeed, i have no idea something is up with some people. but thats just a part of life eh. im still perfectly happy browsing and surfing here.
DJ
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Newbs
SuperDuperBarfly!
If you don't have your parents permission to be on this site, naughty, naughty. But Krusty forgives
Posts: 2,085
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Post by Newbs on Nov 17, 2006 15:17:20 GMT 7
Con, Crippler, wo ai ni. Oh, by the way, I'm also drunk, so if I wake up tomorrow morning, hungover, and find you sleeping, one each side of me, don't take it personally if I  But I gotta agree with you both.  |
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Post by Lotus Eater on Nov 17, 2006 15:39:49 GMT 7
I don't know how other families operated, but if one daughter had a problem she knew that she could talk to me about it without it being broadcast to other family members. It made her feel safe. If 2 of them were at odds, then I would sit them down and work it through or more often expect them to be smart enough to sort it out without anyone interfering - I wanted them to be able to take responsibility for their own actions/feelings etc. But I didn't ever want a sitaution where I asked a third party to take sides or 'tell tales'. Where things affected the entire family then we would sit down and talk about it - but, as a parent I naturally had the final say. What I said wasn't always popular - but it was always carefully thought out and based on as much understanding of the immediate and the broader picture as possible. If you wake up tomorrow next to me Newbs, rest assured, it'll be all your fault!!   |
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Post by Jollyjunklass on Nov 20, 2006 10:59:31 GMT 7
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Post by cheekygal on Nov 20, 2006 11:22:54 GMT 7
Jolly, I asked a million times but still can't get a clear answer. So, I've given up asking and moved on  |
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Ruth
SuperDuperMegaBarfly
God's provisions are strategically placed along the path of your obedience.
Posts: 3,915
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Post by Ruth on Nov 20, 2006 13:46:53 GMT 7
Just like Mom and Dad sometimes have to keep certain things away from the kids' knowledge, so the Brains have to deal with things behind closed doors. I figure that whatever is going on will be made clear when the time is right and the people involved feel like sharing. Kinda like the message Raoul sent out to our emails about the gonging incident and later we were filled in. In the meantime, this place is functioning. Let's not press for details. Let's trust the people who run the show to keep on doing that, as they have so well for three years now.
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Post by Dr. Gonzo on Nov 20, 2006 14:48:19 GMT 7
The management structure is in the process of change. What the final outcome will be, I don't know. As I told George in a PM, "Raoul" is still with us, both as a Brain and a poster, under his previous My Turn Now handle. The forum is still totally functional: post away folks. I'm not trying to be secretive; its just I really don't understand why these things happened, so I can hardly explain it to others.
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Post by cheekygal on Nov 20, 2006 18:33:35 GMT 7
Things happen... And whatever there was - there is actually no need for everyone to know. If *parties* feel like sharing - they will at some point of time. If they feel like they need an opinion from the rest of us - they will kindly inform us about it. We are all grown-ups and we decide how to deal with everything. Just hope no one else leaves... well, except for the really bad ones...  |
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Post by Jollyjunklass on Nov 21, 2006 17:22:46 GMT 7
Okay,
I understand what you all mean. At first I didn't even realize the issue involved some peeps in the forum. I really had NOOOOOOO clue what was up. I just saw all the name changes and couldn't figure things out, nor did I know when everything took place or where to look to find things out. Actually, I am not sure that I am clearly expressing what I wish to say. But, no biggie. I would definitely not post anything to create problems or to bud into anything that's not my business. So I hear ya all after all CURIOSITY KILLED THE CAT, lol.
By the way Newbs, what the heck does that blue-faced guy stand for If anybody is in the know about the blue-faced guy...........
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Post by Miss Motz on Nov 26, 2006 7:59:39 GMT 7
JJL... I agree, I was very bad for a month or so and didn't manage to get into the saloon at all..came back to name changes etc and managed to confuse myself trying to figure out what happened...(didn't read this thread until just now) and then decided if I need to know I'll be told otherwise I carry on as before talking to people in the same manner I have and expect that the same applies in return... I hope everything gets settled to the satisfaction of everyone and the jokes, banter and most importantly advice from all continues...I think thaty is the strongest part of the saloon, I've always felt as though I would not be lead astray by ANY advice given by members here.
Motzie
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