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Post by George61 on Mar 13, 2005 17:39:27 GMT 7
....and we have the ABSOLUTE BEST cricket team in the whole, wide, world.........
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Post by Mattholomew on Mar 13, 2005 17:45:37 GMT 7
I've had my fair share of cricket v. baseball and footall v rugby arguments- there are also the obligatory music boasts, which might be the most subjective and arbitrary thing out of them all. But it's fun as all hell
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Post by Raoul Duke on Mar 13, 2005 18:08:32 GMT 7
Australia has the longest fence in the world ( and it's not for keeping Yanks out) Australia has the longest running Football League in the world. Jesus, it's amazing what beer and boredom can accomplish. Australia does not have the best wine in the world. That credit still goes, sadly, to France. To their credit, Australia has succeeded in developing wines that are not useful in emergency first-aid kits for application as emetics. Doesn't the Great Wall of China count as the longest fence in the world? I would say that having "the absolute best Cricket team in the whole wide world" is a lot like having "the absolute best old ladies' crocheting circle in the whole wide world"...but that would be a disservice to the action, excitement, and competitive tension to be found in crocheting. Don't take it hard, George. Australia still has plenty of real superlatives. Just think how boring the world's zoos would be without Australia!
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Post by George61 on Mar 13, 2005 18:31:14 GMT 7
Au Contraire, cher Raoul. You 'ave fallen foul of anuzzer urban myth. Australie 'as surpassed ze Frogs, as zee premier vin maker. What passes for great wine in France, nowadays, is due to the expertise of "contract winemakers" Young, talented Australians hiring themselves out to teach the doddering French how to make great wine.
Yes, well, you would probably know all.about crocheting! Were we talking about fences?...or Walls? I thought I mentioned "fences" Now, if you can assume a "wall" is a "fence", then I suppose you could assume just about anything. The time has come, Raoul, To throw in the towel. My country just cannot be beat. By hook or by crook, We're the best in the book. So, give up, and accept your defeat.
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Post by Raoul Duke on Mar 14, 2005 6:07:29 GMT 7
Australie 'as surpassed ze Frogs, as zee premier vin maker. You know, I've heard this quaint theory once or twice before, but never from anyone who wasn't Australian. About the same knowledge as I have of cricket: Boring, go away. Sigh. From the Merriam-Webster Dictionary: Fence- "a barrier intended to prevent escape or intrusion or to mark a boundary". It's more commonly used for the wood and/or wire things, but it isn't limited to that. The world's longest fence is in China. A man name of George from Australia saw his theses all end up in failya. Though showing some wit, they're all based on poo And if you post 'em up here then I'll nail ya. nastyz28.com/ubb/icons/boy8.gif [/IMG]
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Post by George61 on Mar 14, 2005 6:37:03 GMT 7
Nice try, Sunshine......pity it doesn't rhyme. Of course that isn't your fault, is it?
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Post by Hamish on Mar 14, 2005 14:26:21 GMT 7
Riot fallout: threat to ban public from games
March 14, 2005 - 11:03AM
Related
Soccer louts add to police woes
Four police hurt in Auburn brawl
The public could be banned from attending some NSW football matches after a riot between two rival Sydney clubs with a long history of antagonism.
About 50 supporters of the Croatian-backed Sydney United team and the Serbian-backed Bonnyrigg White Eagles clashed violently in Sydney's south-west yesterday, injuring two police officers and leading to five arrests.
At the height of the clash, flares and other projectiles were thrown as the two groups turned on each other.
Soccer NSW president Tom Doumanis today warned closing games was an option as officials grappled with the problem of troublemakers on the sidelines.
Soccer NSW also announced an independent inquiry into the violence, and said it would consider banning troublesome fans.
The riot erupted about 3pm (AEDT), shortly before the start of a NSW Premier League match at Edensor Park stadium.
Asked if he would consider conducting some matches away from the public to avoid rioting, Mr Doumanis said it was "an option".
"When circumstances are such that we cannot be assured that the game will be witnessed in the spirit of the game then that is an option that is very much available to us," he told ABC radio.
"A handful of idiots marred the game who were determined to make a spectacle of themselves and to make a stupid political statement.
"As far as we're concerned that is not a behaviour that we will ever welcome back to our grounds."
Mr Doumanis said the rival clubs had not faced each other for 22 years because of long-running antagonism.
"(But) we thought everyone had matured over that time. Obviously some still have long memories," he said.
"We believed we had made the transition to the 21st century. We are not going to sit around and allow them to happen again."
Four of the five arrested following the violence have been released without charge.
The fifth, a 25-year-old man from Blacktown in Sydney's west, will face court next month on a string of offences including riot, affray and assault.
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Post by George61 on Mar 14, 2005 14:30:46 GMT 7
Hamish, what else can one expect from a bunch of foreigners?
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Post by Raoul Duke on Mar 15, 2005 10:59:38 GMT 7
Nice try, Sunshine......pity it doesn't rhyme. Oh, it does too rhyme, Mary. At least it does if you fill in for RoboCop. And if you read it in something resembling Standard English.
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Post by George61 on Mar 15, 2005 11:02:15 GMT 7
Ha!! You're asking us to make excuses for you??
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Post by George61 on Mar 15, 2005 11:09:04 GMT 7
They say that Raoul is the man Who writes verses that no-one can scan. When told this was so, He replied, "yes. I know. But that bloody Robocop stuffs up everything it possibly can.
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motis
Barfly
This is my personal text. There are many like it, but this text is mine!
Posts: 84
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Post by motis on Mar 15, 2005 12:21:12 GMT 7
My country is so great that I don't even have to tell you about it. FLAWLESS VICTORY.
Also, I have a theory about Australia. I've noticed that although you always hear about Australia being this vast, unpopulated land with hardly anybody in it, there seem to be Aussies cluttering up every corner, nook, and cranny of the globe. Judging by the local Aussie population density, I suspect there are actually something like nine billion of them worldwide. WHAT ARE THEY PLOTTING, AND WHY DON'T THEY LIKE BEING IN THEIR OWN COUNTRY?!?
Finally, a retaliatory limerick:
John Howard's an Aussie with class He's got a big mouth like a bass His hands are in other folks' pockets And his legs dangle out Bush's a$$.
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Post by George61 on Mar 15, 2005 12:52:05 GMT 7
I like the sentiment, although a Limerick ALWAYS must have five lines.....as for retalitory, well most sensible Australians would agree with it. However, tis good to see you trying. Keep up the good work. Now, as to why we are all over the world. We are an inquisitive people, and we want to see how the less fortunate make the most of their miserable lives.
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Post by Hamish on Mar 15, 2005 13:38:30 GMT 7
Now, as to why we are all over the world. We are an inquisitive people, and we want to see how the less fortunate make the most of their miserable lives. Bullpoo! It was "get on the first boat out, or it's the chain gang fur youse (an' not the first time for yur family, I might add)...ya BASTARD!"
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Newbs
SuperDuperBarfly!
If you don't have your parents permission to be on this site, naughty, naughty. But Krusty forgives
Posts: 2,085
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Post by Newbs on Mar 15, 2005 13:58:49 GMT 7
Motis wrote and then
Well, Motis they are in every nook and cranny of the globe, EXCEPT IN BLOODY HANGZHOU, where they are pretty thin on the ground let me tell you. You've no idea how tough it is, having to slum it with expats such as Kiwis, Yanks, Canucks and Poms. (Have I insulted nearly everyone on this forum?)
As to why they don't like being in their own country, you have in fact provided the answer. If anyone can make you not proud of your own country it is John Winston Howard. As far as I'm concerned he has achieved the impossible, and made me ashamed to be Australian, at least some of the time. Well done little Johnnie.
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Post by con's fly is open on Mar 15, 2005 16:13:25 GMT 7
(Have I insulted nearly everyone on this forum?) You forgot the Irish.
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Post by George61 on Mar 15, 2005 16:23:14 GMT 7
Ha! You can't insult the Irish! ;D
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Newbs
SuperDuperBarfly!
If you don't have your parents permission to be on this site, naughty, naughty. But Krusty forgives
Posts: 2,085
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Post by Newbs on Mar 15, 2005 16:25:05 GMT 7
Of course I didn't forget the Irish. Who hates the Irish? Isn't everyone in the world descended from the Irish? Anyhow, in 2 days time I promise you I won't forget the Irish.
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Post by Mr Nobody on Mar 15, 2005 18:03:45 GMT 7
I think australia was the first country to give the vote to women. And the wall of china used to be the longest, but bits have been taken away and used as gravel, so hardly counts as the longest now. It is in relatively short bits. We also have the worlds most ridiculous biology. Koalas! the Platypus! Ecologies regulated by fire frequencies! Out of the 20 most venemous reptiles we score something like 16 depending on the method of scoring them. Check out the spiders sometime. Most countries have something like one or two species of electric rays in their waters, we have something like seven. And we have teh most foolish names of any country. All the good names were taken then they discovered australia. Budgerigar = not good to eat. Wangi wangi = place of stinking seaweed. Kangaroo = what are you pointing at you stupid white person you. Something like that. Does this count as right or stupid? (at least i didn't google)
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Post by George61 on Mar 15, 2005 19:56:47 GMT 7
C'mon, Mr. N....what could be more ridiculous than POUGHKEEPSIE? If " budgerigar" means "not good to eat", how can that be a foolish name? Sounds perfectly sensible to me. Makes more sense than "lovebird" Actually "budgerigar" probably means "not big enough to eat"
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Post by con's fly is open on Mar 16, 2005 3:19:35 GMT 7
I would point out that Canada has NONE of the most poisonous critters on earth. And apart from the sasquatch, no primates in the wild (I hate monkeys).
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Post by George61 on Mar 16, 2005 5:09:41 GMT 7
Who needs poisonous critters, when you can freeze to death anywhere in the country?
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Post by Mr Nobody on Mar 16, 2005 7:12:15 GMT 7
Yeah, i forgot, most poisonous everything. Fish (both the eating and the stinging), ants, spiders, snakes, fruit. You name it, we have it. Gods own venom factory. Stinging nettle TREES for gods sake. Near where i live, you can't even wipe your bum in the bush on a nice big leaf without knowing something about biology. And if we didn't have one, then some idiot imported them. White tailed spiders. Redback spiders (= black widow, maybe, depending on who you talk to). European wasp. Lots of poisonous weeds. Hey, even the old truth serum grows here, a bush in QLD (should have used a few pints on Joh way back when) (at least one of our bushes cannot tell a lie, hehehe. sorry about that , couldn't help it.) We have few hideous diseases though. No rabies. Only had the plague a few times here, total deaths about fifty except for Sydney China town where they barricaded it and burned it to the ground about a hundred years ago. Do they count? apparently not. When the next pandemic starts, oz is the safest place next to antartica, which always an option too.
And we have the Yowie to match canada's bigfoot as a mythical wild primate. Only other wild primates here are either naked and black, living in the desert, or naked and white and drunk, living in a tent.
But it is true about the wines. Oz trashes Frog wines all the time. I used to write about it. Hunter reds rule!!!!
Anything else? We have Flacco, the world's funniest alien. ANd we have the worlds best politicians. Even they dont take themselves seriously. What other country would have had Fat as a hog beasley as a defence minister when he gets stuck getting in and out of a tank. (I worked for the defence dept at that time, and i loved that clip). And the only reason people vote for howard is that if you got to have a some monkey in charge, then at least he should LOOK like a monkey. Then you can watch and laugh, unless you just got sent to the front.
And by the time anyone finds out why there are so many australians out there in the real world it will be TOO LATE!! (a clue - why are so many australians bar tenders?)
( . . . . . i just hope i can think of a really good plot before someone asks me what it is)
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Post by George61 on Mar 16, 2005 11:05:19 GMT 7
Yeah! I'd forgotten about Flacco...been so long since I've seen him......and we've got Mr. Nobody...." Nobody does it better"
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Post by Nate M on Mar 16, 2005 11:20:39 GMT 7
Umm, perhaps the same one where we had a professional wrestler and an aging, Republican action star elected governor?
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